Quoted

“Martyrdom covers a multitude of sins.”

Mark Twain

The Challenge

I am challenging myself to a "No Buy January".

Let me try to clarify this a little bit. For the entire month of Januaury, I am going to try not to purchase anything other than household necessities (food, gas, toilet paper, etc). That means, no new clothes which none of us need. No nothing off Amazon. I think I spent 56,000 dollars there for Christmas so if I succeed in this, their stock may suffer. Just sayin. No nothing off eBay. No cute antique silverplate items. No slightly used books. No craft kits. The more I list here, the worse this idea seems. Ugh.

I really am only doing this as an experiment for my own life. We're not in a financial crisis. My husband is not screaming about the money I spend. (He never fusses about money at all which is wonderful and odd at the same time.) But basically I had an epiphany of sorts during the beginning of the holiday season. Someone asked me what I wanted for Christmas and I could not think of one stinkin thing that I needed. At that same time, the idea of simplifying my life became this nagging, ever present idea for me.

So, if I need nothing and I know that God is calling me to make some margins in my life, then there really shouldn't be any difficulty at all in not making any unnecessary purchases for 30 whole days. Right? Right?

This isn't an all or nothing challenge. If one of the kids gets invited to a birthday party, I will buy a present. If somebody needs a black turtleneck for some school nonsense, I will buy it. I'm not doing this to punish my family. I'm guessing most of them won't even notice. I just want to see how much time I actually waste on being a consumer. And then see if I can put that time to better use.

And please don't worry about the state of the US economy. My grocery bill alone can sustain it.

Quoted

"When I was young I admired clever people. Now that I'm old I admire kind people."

Abraham Heschel

Silver Lining

I may or may not have gone off the eBay deep end.

I can explain...kinda.

I really, really, really love silver.

Also, I never actually owned any.

Kevin had a few nice pieces when I met him. A tea set, a couple of pitchers and a few platters. (Funny story...once when we were dating, Kevin's ex-wife wanted to borrow the platters. He agreed and told her just to come by and get them. This was before the robbery when the doors were not routinely locked. When we got home, he noticed the platters were still there. He called to see why his ex hadn't picked them up and she said she couldn't use them because they were tarnished. This story tickles me every time I think about it because I just can't figure out who she thought might actually polish those platters.) Anyway, the tea set and at least one pitcher were stolen which broke my heart.

After we got married, I polished all the remaining pieces and didn't think much about them for a while. Then a few months ago, I read about a silver punch bowl in my Southern Living magazine. This created an unquenchable need for a silver punch bowl in my life. How had I lived 37 years without one? The author of the article said she used hers to chill champagne and to ice down shrimp. Champagne! Shrimp! I love both those things! The hunt was on. Unfortunately, every gal south of the Mason-Dixon line must have read the same article because the bidding for silver punch bowls was going hardcore when I arrived. It was not pretty.

During the three month period that I was stalking the punch bowls, I discovered all kinds of awesome silverplate pieces. First, I fell in love with these butter dishes.




(Also I got those candlesticks so cheap it was nearly stealing.)

But mainly what I love about the butter dishes is the knife.



Ain't it cute?

Then, I started seeing these cake baskets. I know. I never heard of such a thing either. Apparently, brides used to carry them in the early 1900's. These things could bring out the hoarder in me. I just want all of them.



Finally, the Southern Living furor died down and I got this beauty for a ridiculously low price. It is perfect for me. The best part was that it was tarnished when I bought it. Cleaning up a piece of tarnished silver makes me feel like I have discovered a treasure. It thrills me.



I'm trying hard to taper off my silver hobby. If I really want to simplify my life, spending an hour a day on eBay is probably not the best way to achieve that. But there is just something about silver. I'm not sure what the draw is. Maybe I just like the idea of having something to leave for my children. Maybe I just like shiny things. Maybe I just like the idea of having something to hide from the Yankees.

Book Review

Polygamy infuriates and fascinates me. It drives me nuts yet I cannot pass by an opportunity to hear or read about it. I almost always regret it. This book was no exception.

The lonely polygamist is Golden Richards. He has four wives and 24 children. At the beginning of this novel, he finds himself embroiled in a chaste love affair with another man's wife. Normally I would never use the phrase 'he finds himself' when referring to adultery. That's the cop out excuse of almost every lying cheater.

"I didn't mean to."
"I don't know how this happened."
"I had no control over my feelings."

Blah, blah, blah. But I use that to describe this situation because Golden Richards doesn't seem to do anything intentionally. He is a pretty pathetic character yet, for some reason, I like him. I give tons of credit to the author for creating any sympathy at all in me for his character. Because, in case I haven't mentioned it eleventy times. I NO LIKE POLYGAMISTS! I watched one episode of that show 'Sister Wives' on TLC and almost went insane. Conversely, I always enjoyed 'Big Love' on HBO mostly because it highlighted all the obvious problems that polygamy creates.
Katie saw me reading this book and asked me what a polygamist was. I explained the concept to her in the most basic of terms appropriate for a nine year old. Her immediate reaction was "I would never share my husband with another woman!" See. Even a fourth grader can see how jacked up this lifestyle is...but I digress.

The book goes on to talk about how complicated Golden's life is (shocking, huh?) In the end there is tragedy, confession and, in a way, redemption. It's a thought provoking book. I would not say that Brady Udall is antagonistic or sympathetic toward the idea of polygamy. The novel is really about this particular man and while his lifestyle may be unique(thank God) his character faults aren't.

Merry Christmas!

Christmas Eve 2010

The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned.

Isaiah 9:2

Brrr!

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Dear Gaylord,

I still hate you. I will never get over you taking Opryland away from me. When I think of all the fun my kids and I could be having every summer, I am filled with rage at your corporation. That being said...I really enjoyed Ice!, Snow! and the Rockettes. Normally we would have had to win the lottery to attend these productions but my beloved children's minister, Amy Buttrey, gave me an insane coupon code back in October. I would tell you how cheap the Rockettes tickets were but it would just make you mad. But I assure you, it has to be a good deal to get all 9 of us plus Dylan's girlfriend tickets to ANYTHING.

Christmas Frivolity

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Interesting facts about our family.

1 - We will use any excuse to go eat at Demos'.

2 - We will pay ten bucks to see a pretty good Christmas light display if it is in Lebanon because there is a Demos' there.

3 - Not one of us knows the complete lyrics to any Christmas carol. It's pitiful.

4 - All of us know the complete lyrics to "Tonight the DJ got Us Fallin In Love Again" by Usher.

Just for me

More from the 'Deeper Still Conference'.

Kay Arthur was the first to speak on Friday night. She began in Matthew Chapter 1. The intent and purpose of her teaching that evening was to discuss 'Emmanuel- God with us'. Seems pretty clear cut, right? She preached for about 2 hours. It seemed like about 12 minutes. She started at Matthew 1 and went straight through to Matthew 28. It was actually pretty amazing. But I want to tell you what happened about halfway through. She looks up and says "You need to simplify your life. Do you really need more stuff? Do you really need one more thing to sit on a shelf?" I think I may have stopped breathing at that point. It was such a sudden statement. So completely unrelated to her intended topic and so obviously meant for me.

Hear me out on this. I'm sure there were many women at that conference who need to simplify their lives. But I knew that message was for me. I am not an arrogant person but I am fully persuaded that God is crazy in love with me. (He feels the same about you. We've been all through this.) That being said, God also knows that sometimes I am in need of a spiritual sledgehammer begfore I really 'get' what he is trying to say to me. Before the weekend was over, that hammer would fall two more times.

Here's the backstory. In the week prior to the conference, my friend Jen wrote this blog post. I simply could not get it out of my mind. Day after day I just kept thinking about it. Her statement about margins in our lives just rocked my world. I realized basically that I don't have any margins. Not in one single area of my life. Reading Jen's words made me realize how much I wanted them.

Kevin and I talked about it for a couple of days and both of us kept coming back to the fact that the word 'margin' was such a great explanation for what we needed to create. Neither of us had ever heard that word used in that context before. But thinking about that clean, white space around the edge of a piece of paper created a perfect picture for what I needed in my life. The embarrassing part of this story is that during this week leading up to the conference at the same time that I was ruminating on Jen's admonishment to 'simplify', I was in a desperate search for plastic candy canes to decorate my mailbox. Let me tell you something. Nobody NEEDS plastic candy canes on their mailbox. This would be become a pretty good metaphor for how I was wasting my time and treasure.

Back to the conference.

Priscilla Shirer was the first to speak on Saturday morning. The point of her teaching was about having 'an empty quiver'. Basically she was encouraging us to use all we have and trust God to replenish it. She talked about how we all want to keep a little back as a safety net. She was speaking about lots of areas, emotionally, financially, etc. At some point, she says "And you don't have any margins in your life." I don't know what she said after that because I'm pretty sure I lost consciousness for a second. Margins...she actually said margins.

Saturday afternoon, Beth Moore presented her session. She was teaching from Luke. She was talking about several passages where Luke says that Mary 'treasured or pondered' something in her heart. She said that our society doesn't really value that kind of behavior. We don't allow ourselves time to meditate, think, pray, whatever. We just rush through the day hoping to survive. Then she said we don't have any God margins in our life. No place that we set aside to be with Him or think about His Word. You should know,at this point, that I was caught between the ugly cry and hysterical laughter. It wasn't pretty. Then Beth said "It's so funny that Priscilla used the word 'margins' this morning because we don't compare teaching before we present it." I knew it wasn't 'funny' and I also knew it was no coincidence.

So the question I am posing to myself now is this. How messed up is my life that God would compel my four favorite Bible teachers to speak to me about this one specific thing? And how can I possibly fail to respond?

Deeper Still 2010

I have a love/dislike relationship with the idea of the 'women's Bible conference'.

Let me get the dislike part out of the way first. I find myself in head shaking amazement at the sheer numbers of women who attend these things. (Full disclosure: I have only attended 3 or 4 of these conferences. My experience may not be true of the genre as a whole.) I wonder what the world would be like if these same women, myself included, could maintain the same kind of passion and intensity for Jesus outside of these few weekends sprinkled through the year. What kind of impact could we have just in our own families? Other than that, my main problem is that, as in all situations, people who claim to be Christians don't act like I want them to much of the time. For example, there is no biblical edict that says "Thou shalt pick up your trash before you leave the arena." But I just feel like people should do that. Even godless heathens ought to pick up after themselves. In their defense, I'm sure that lots of these gals pick up after people 24/7. Maybe they go for one of these weekends and just determine that they ain't gonna lift a finger to do anything. I understand and commiserate with that situation but it's still tacky. My other pet peeve is with Lifeway's general seating policy. If you sell 15 thousand tickets and yet guarantee no one a seat, mayhem will ensue. Trust me here. If the conference begins at 7PM and the arena doors open at 5:30, you can expect 12 thousand people to be pressed up to the doors by 4:45. These people act worse than Black Friday shoppers. And nobody believes 'the last shall be first' when it comes down to making sure that the Pineville Baptist Women's group gets 67 seats all together. It's just not a nice scene and I dread it every time.

Now for the stuff I love.

First, I am so blessed to have Savannah. She is such a spiritually mature kid. This is the 2nd conference we have attended together. I'm not sure many other 12 year old kids could sit through 2 full days of Bible teaching. She assured me that she loved it and is even bugging me to go to another one next summer.

Friday night the conference began with Kay Arthur. I love her more than peanut butter. She wrote the first Bible study I ever did and so she feels like my spiritual grandmother. Kay and I both became Christian at the age of 29 so I look to her as an example of what's possible for a gal who cam to Jesus a little later than others. Saturday speakers included Beth Moore and Priscilla Shirer. I'll have more to say later about their specific messages. (Ain't you excited?)

But I attend these things for one main reason - the music. One of the biggest adjustments in moving from a Baptist to a Methodist church is...well...basically the Methodists suck at music. They are good at lots of other stuff but praise and worship is just not their area of emphasis. When I am at a conference, I sing those hymns at the top of my terrible voice and it is, without a doubt, some of the most precious moments of my life. When you stand among that many people singing "Holy, Holy, Holy" I think you have just a litte taste of what heaven may be like. I'm assuming I will have a beautiful voice at that point but I can't support that with one speck of scripture.

The Many Faces of Ava

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Quoted

“Complete weakness and dependence will always be the occasion for the Spirit of God to manifest His power.”

Oswald Chambers

Thankful

This is the main reason I keep teaching the 2nd grade Sunday School class. I wish (and I think God does too) that we all could be so honest in our prayers.

Quoted - The B-I-B-L-E Edition

Yet the LORD longs to be gracious to you; he rises to show you compassion. For the LORD is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for him!

Isaiah 30:18

Halls Decked

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Quoted - C.S. Lewis Edition

"I know now, Lord, why you utter no answer. You are yourself the answer."

C.S. Lewis

Taylor Swift - Dear John

Katie loves Taylor Swift.

Therefore we are all required to love Taylor Swift.

The first time I heard this song, I wept like a 16 year old. I know there is some drama and speculation regarding who this song may be about. Let me just say that I could not care less. But her voice is so plaintive and and so...raw in this song. It just unleashes the memory of every heartbreak I have ever experienced. That's a lot of heartbreak people. I still really like the song though because, apparently, I am a glutton for punishment.

Rest in Peace

Elizabeth Edwards is one of my heroes. I love her as much as I hate her lying, piece of crap, husband and his idiot mistress. I pray for her children and I pray for a world that needs a whole lot more women like her.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Scenes from Kline Manor

Radio Announcer : Other than the big ones - God, family, health - what kind of quirky things are you thankful for?"

Me: "Aretha Franklin"

Kevin: "Antibiotics"

No other person in the friggin universe would have given Kevin's answer to that question. And that's why I love him more than a sane woman should.

Birfday Partay!

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Quoted - C.S. Lewis Edition

"Of course God knows what will happen if we use our freedom the wrong way. Apparently He thinks it's worth the risk."

C.S. Lewis

Fall MishMash

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Quoted

"Even the fear of death is nothing compared to the fear of not having lived authentically and fully."


- Frances Moore Lappe

Book Review

Let me try to explain this book. Henry is a 'practice baby' at a university in the 1960's. Apparently this was a real thing in the world. Several Home economics programs (Did you know that I was a home-ec Major my first year in college? True story.) had homes set up wherein they had orphaned infants that were raised by groups of college girls for about two years. After that, the babies were adopted by 'real' families. Henry is one of these babies. But he is so irresistable the stodgy house mother who never gets attached to the house babies falls completely in love with him and adopts and raises him in the practice house.

So I figured the book would be about how Henry grows up to be a womanizer. The author spends a ridiculous amount of time discussing Henry's need to please each of his practice 'mothers' and how he is incapable of choosing a favorite in any situation. That's not really how it went down though. Henry grows up, hates his adopted mom(for no real good reason?)pretends to be mute for a few years, becomes an artist, goes to work at Walt Disney, and dates a few girls. 4 to be exact. Maybe I am just jaded. But I don't think 4 girlfriends spanning between adolescence and your mid twenties grants you man-whore status. Am I wrong here?

Anyway, I love the idea of this book. I love that I had no idea such a lifestyle ever existed. But, honestly, I found Henry to be a pretty resistable character.

Quoted

"The big problem is not whether the Bible is true. The big problem is whether it is true in you."

AW Tozer

Field Trip!

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I am now going to admit my dirty little secret to you.

I am so sick of the pumpkin patch. There. I said it.

I am still keenly aware of what a blessing it is to be a stay at home mom who has the ability to go on field trips. I was only able to do this with Savannah and Kaylee a handful of times. I missed a lot and it broke my heart. That being said...I still hate the pumpkin patch. In my defense, I have gone three years in a row. It's always the same. 6 hours in a field with a bunch of kids bored outta their dang minds. Also, sometimes there are port-a-potties which makes the whole experience mo better.

Christmas Music Season Kickoff

Look. I know.

I post this video almost every year. I have to do it in case any of you have missed it. You need to listen to this version of this song...daily. Probably for the rest of your stinkin life. And don't stop 3 minutes in. The last minute and thirty seconds are good enough to make a Baptist dance. Trust me here.

And to any of you who would complain that is to early for Christmas music.

1. Bite me.
2. My aunt Lana says that the weekend of Christmas Village is the official kickoff to the Christmas music season. I don't know why she is in charge of this but she is. Just accept it and move on.


Also, this is probably as good a time as any to tell my David Phelps story. I have been a huge fan of him for probably ten years. (If you never listen to any kind of Christian music, chances are good you have no idea who he is. It's nothing to be ashamed of, I just feel so bad that you have wasted so much of your life.) His voice to me is really beyond any other vocalist I have ever heard. Listening to him makes me feel like I am taking the perfect bubble bath. From me, this is the highest praise.

So... once upon a time, my husband left me with three kids and I was forced to leave my domestic headquarters and get a 'real' job. I found said job at a hospital. I can't tell you where I worked but let's just say that people came there for voice training, care, etc. One of the employees there was a voice teacher ( aPhD!) who worked with a lot of big stars. Not so much to fix anything wrong with their voices but, often, just to help them take better care of their 'instrument'. So one horrible day I was at work. I was in my tiny 3 wall office leaning my head against the outer wall in abject despair. I was just as sad as I could ever remember being. And the worse part was that I could not envision ever not being sad again. I don't know how long I had sat there wallowing in that state when I heard the voice. Drifting through those flimsy walls from the voice doctor's office to mine was David Phelps...singing.

I'm sure, if you are a skeptic, that you could never believe that God would arrange events to bring Mr Phelps to this specific place at that specific time just to give me a much needed 'boost'. But I believe that is exactly what happened. You just cannot imagine how much God loves me (he feel the same about you). It's just the kind of thing He would do.

And, no, I didn't get up from that desk and find my whole life changed in an instant. I still had a cruddy job, a mind numbing commute and a crappy minivan. I would live many years after that day still alone and sad. But that miraculous serenade proved something very important. I knew then and still that God sees me. He doesn't just love and think about me. He sees me. And that's a revelation that changed my life.

Quoted

"Some people claim to be normal Christians when actually they mean they are nominal Christians."

AW Tozer

The D Word

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be divorced? This, to me, is akin to wondering "What would it be like for the person I love most in this world to run over me with a semi truck daily for about ten years or so?" That is to say divorce is never something I contemplated until I experienced it. Nora Ephron (I love her so much, don't you?) has put words to almost all my feelings about divorce. You can(and should) read the whole thing here.

But here are some of my favorite parts.

But when you've had children with someone you're divorced from, divorce defines every­thing; it's the lurking fact, a slice of anger in the pie of your brain.

This is so true. I have no words to explain how much.

Of course, there are good divorces, where every­thing is civil, even friendly. Child support payments arrive. Visitations take place on schedule. Your ex-­husband rings the doorbell and stays on the other side of the threshold; he never walks in without knocking and helps himself to the coffee. In my next life I must get one of those divorces.

Me too, Nora. Me too.

But I can't think of anything good about divorce as far as the children are concerned. You can't kid yourself about that, although many people do. They say things like, "It's better for children not to grow up with their parents in an unhappy marriage." But unless the par­ents are beating each other up, or abusing the children, kids are better off if their parents are together.

Every one of you know this is true also. Even if you think you disagree, you are just deluding yourself.

Divorce seems as if it will last forever, and then suddenly, one day, your children grow up, move out, and make lives for themselves, and except for an occa­sional flare, you have no contact at all with your ex-husband.

Merciful and loving God...please let her be right about this.

Quoted

"Develop interest in life as you see it; in people, things, literature, music - the world is so rich, simply throbbing with rich treasures, beautiful souls and interesting people. Forget yourself."


Henry Miller (1891 - 1980)

You don't want to hear this

How long will you love delusions and seek false gods?
Psalm 4:2

God is not OK with you.

He loves you but...

He is definitely not OK with you.

Before you grab your torches and pitchforks, let me make something clear. God's not OK with me either.

You cannot love your sin and be OK with God. You cannot declare it from the rooftops (or on Facebook depending on how you roll) while defying anyone to call your sin what it is...sin and be OK with God.

We have this really bad habit of making idols. We don't want to worship the One True God and His Son. We want to worship our chosen lifestyle, a few selected verses from the Bible or even a God we have created. One who is only love without judgement of any kind. We're like teenagers who think their lives would be perfect if only their parents would let them do whatever they want.

Let me give you an example. My ex-husband's wife says this about their adultery. "We may have gone about it in the wrong way but God wanted us to be together." I could honestly write a whole book about that statement. But for my purpose here let me just say this. You know you have created a false god in your own image when that god hates what you hate, loves what you love and approves of any actions you do as long as the outcome is what you desire.

God wants more than anything to be OK with all of us. He wanted it so much that he sacrificed His Son to atone for all our sins. But declaring your allegiance with Jesus while simultaneously relishing in sin is like trying to cover up cancer with a band aid. You aren't fooling anyone except perhaps...yourself.

Quoted

He reveals deep and secret things; He knows what is in the darkness, And light dwells with Him.

Daniel 2:22

Amen

You have put more joy in my heart
than they have when their grain and wine abound.
In peace I will both lie down and sleep;
for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.

Psalm 4:7

On a daily basis I allow peace and joy to be stolen from me. I'm not proud of that. In fact, I am downright furious about it. Being furious steals even more of my peace and joy. And I have to start taking responsibility for allowing that to happen.

Quoted - C.S Lewis Edition

"Fallen man is not simply an imperfect creature who needs improvement: he is a rebel who must lay down his arms."

C.S. Lewis

Book Review - Quitters Edition

Dear Mr Cronin,

I really wanted to read your book. I even requested it from the library. I only do this for books I want to read big time. I had read several glowing reviews of your work and even saw it featured on Amazon and in the Costco magazine. (I trust the Costco magazine in all areas.)

I only made it through 60 pages. And they were 60 awesome pages. You write really, really well. I was completely entranced by your story. You had already woven a rather intricate plot foundation. I was impressed.

But I just had to put your book down. It was just too much. Not too long. I love long books. Just too much.

By page 60, I had already been introduced to two dozen characters. And every one of those characters had a horrible back story. I suffered through the FBI agent who had watched his infant daughter die. The chemically castrated pedophile who was working on the highly secure secret project. The down on her luck waitress who becomes a single mom then a prostitute then a murderer. When this character abandons her 6 year old daughter at a convent, I nearly passed out from grief just imagining what it would take to walk away from one of my children. You wrote that stuff very well. But when I read the story about the nun who befriends the little girl, I knew I had to stop reading. Nothing you wrote was intentionally shock producing. I know you weren't trying to burden my soul. But you did. And, honestly sir, I am just to tender-hearted for this sort of thing. We live in a world that is pretty brutal. Just reading the newspaper can often send me into the 'ugly cry'. So while, I am sure that the rest of your novel is just as well written as the first 60 pages, I just don't have the emotional fortitude to withstand it.

Sincerely,
Rachel

Quoted

"To know that God thinks about me is the beginning of my journey of faith."

AW Tozer

Book Review

I think I was supposed to like this book. I didn't.

I really like the idea of this book. A couple meet and yada, yada, yada at their college graduation. They form an odd friendship and each chapter of the book takes place on the anniversary of the day they met. This goes on for like twenty years. Sounds pretty awesome, doesn't it? It wasn't.

Basically I felt like I had read about this couple before. They felt stale to me. Pretty, smart, politically motivated Emma and rebellious, rich, handsome Dexter. I assume that I am supposed to want these two crazy kids to work out their differences and make the relationship work. They do and I could've cared less. Some other stuff happens so I won't spoil it for you but, trust me, that stuff is pretty boring too.

Quoted

"Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were."


- Cherie Carter-Scott

Book Review

Oh Pat Conroy...I am so in love with you. I just don't think I will ever get over it. I don't think I even want to.

Let me start with this. If the only connection you have with Conroy is that you watched the movie "The Prince of Tides", then I want you to get up right now, get yourself to a library and find the C section. Get Beach Music, The Lords of Discipline or The Great Santini. It makes no difference what you get. Just get something. Then ignore your kids, your spouse, your job and your dog and just read it. The negative aspect of this experience is that you will live the rest of your life in bitter regret of all the years you wasted without Pat Conroy's prose dancing in your brain. Honestly, you should be ashamed of yourself.

Conroy is not a "Southern Writer". I cannot explain to you how fully I hate that phrase. Carson McCullers, Harper Lee, Eudora Welty. These are all great writers. They also, like Conroy, happen to be from and write about the South. John Steinbeck wrote about California. Nobody calls him a "Western Writer". In fact, there are no other novelists from any region that are categorized this way. Now obviously I realize that the South is special. For instance, we are not ashamed of crazy people. We actually enjoy them. Also, we really, really like to eat. So food makes repeated and often sensual appearances in "Southern Literature". I hate that phrase too, by the way. Fiddle-dee-dee.


If you haven't ever read Conroy, please don't start with this book. At some point, you should read it but not first. See Pat Conroy hasn't published a book in 14 years. Apparently every idea he had during that time ended up in this book. I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it but it's not for the uninitiated. The basic premise of the book is how one day can (and often does) change your life completely. For the main character, Leo Bloom, that day comes during the summer before his senior year. He meets the people who will form his core group of friends for the rest of his life. He also finds out that his mother used to be a nun. See, this is the kind of thing that makes Conroy a genius. He will create a side story based on a secondary character that really could be a stand alone novel. And, honestly, have you ever heard of a nun who leaves the convent to marry, have children and become a high school principal? Well you have now. See how this guy has enriched your pitiful life already?

This is far from a perfect novel. But it's pretty dang entertaining if you are willing to surrender yourself to the experience...which I always am. What else do I have to do?

Quoted - C.S. Lewis Edition

"We may think God wants actions of a certain kind, but God wants people of a certain sort."

C.S. Lewis

A Warning

I have been writing a lot. Mostly in my head. I have created many posts that are in 'draft' form in my mind that I have been hesitant to put on (virtual) paper. Mostly because I am scared. I fear that my often strong and possibly offensive views could make people angry. I realize this is silly. This is MY blog. I started it primarily for my children. My goal was one thing. I wanted my kids to know me. While I hope I live a long, healthy life, I know that all of us are mortal. With that knowledge comes the desire to leave something of myself as an inheritance. I wanted this blog to be a diary, a scrapbook, a love letter and a devotional for Savannah, Kaylee and Ava. And I would love for it to be all those things to Dylan, Emily, Anna and Katie too.

I want them to see the real me.

Therein lies the problem. The real me is opinionated and loud. The real me is also tolerant of the opinions of others. You won't find me arguing often. I really do believe that everyone has a right to their own opinions (even if they drive me nuts) and to live their life however they see fit (assuming that doesn't infringe on the health and well being of my family.)But I feel that I have hidden part of myself in order to prove how agreeable I can be. I don't want to be a loud mouthed hypocrite. But it's disingenuous for me to continue to ignore aspects of my life that make up the core of the real me.

Most of the material that I have tried to subdue relates to my faith. Any future posts you may read regarding my Christian beliefs will be presented unapologetically. That's the real me. I am a Christian. I believe that the Bible is true. Yep. Every word of it. (And, no, I won't be debating you about a random verse you pulled out of Leviticus. There is an old covenant and a new covenant. Jesus died to set me free from the old covenant. It's not complicated but I'll explain it to you later if you like.) I strive to follow Jesus in every way possible. I am also a sinner who fails every day (often multiple times per day.) Much of my hesitation stems from my shame at the behavior of many so-called 'christians'. Understand that I do not consider it my job to judge the sincerity of anyone's faith. That being said, the Bible clearly tell me that I can discern a real Christian by the 'fruit' I see in their lives. So, if you call yourself a Christian but you march around with a sign that says "God hates Fags" then understand that I am judging you and that your 'fruit' proves to me that you have no real relationship with Christ. God hates sin but He is crazy in love with sinners. On that topic, I won't back down from an argument.

"For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God."

I do not think I am better than you regardless of what your belief system may be. But I want my kids to know that their mom was an imperfect woman who spent her life trying to serve a perfect God.


"For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ, for it is the power of God to salvation for everyone who believes"

Quoted

"The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong."


- Mahatma Gandhi (1869 - 1948)

Just Ava

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If you are 7 years old and your sisters spend all afternoon trying on Halloween costumes, there are plenty of things you can do to pass the time.

Quoted

"Integrity without knowledge is weak and useless, and knowledge without integrity is dangerous and dreadful."


- Samuel Johnson (1709 - 1784)

Happy Birthday Kevin!

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Quoted

"That's the secret of entertaining. You make your guests feel welcome and at home. If you do that honestly, the rest takes care of itself."


- Barbara Hall

We Saw Rock City!!!

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I have made many, many trips to Chattanooga, TN. But for some reason I have never been to Rock City. While Kevin was on his ridiculously long European business trip, Kaylee and I made the trip. We only had a day and a half but one on one time with any of my kids is such a rarity, I cherish every moment. We rode the incline railway and spent some time at Lookout Mountain on Saturday. That evening we were supposed to attend a murder mystery dinner theatre thing. Kaylee was really looking forward to it. Unfortunately, I did not factor in the impossibility of finding a parking spot in downtown Chattanooga on a Saturday night. I finally parked somewhere near Atlanta and we started walking. The second mistake I made was trusting my friggin GPS on my cell phone. Needless to say, we missed the show. But we did see a large portion of downtown while we wandered around for the better part of an hour. We joyously made it back to our car and headed back to the hotel. Kaylee was a really good sport about the whole thing which made me feel much better.

Sunday morning, we went to Rock City. I was completely awestruck. It is just simply amazing. I would not compare Rock City to the Grand Canyon but both of those place left me with the overwhelming knowledge that my God is an extravagant God. I am so humbled by His creation. I also realized something important about Kaylee. I am crazy in love with that kid. She makes me laugh. She makes me think. She sleeps while I drive.

Quoted

"If there is one thing worse than being an ugly duckling in a house of swans, it's having the swans pretend there's no difference."


- Teena Booth

Book Review

This book almost ruined my weekend. Not because it was bad. Quite the opposite. It was so dang good I kept ignoring the kids and Kevin to sneak away to read. It was one of those great Tennessee fall weekends where the temperature is just perfection and the leaves are falling like snowflakes. The family was doing yardwork and having a great time outside while I was locked in the bathroom reading Juliet. (And, yes, I read in the bathroom. It's the only place in the house where nobody bugs me and frankly, I don't need your judgement.)

Juliet is about an American woman discovering her Italian ancestry. There's a big mystery. Yeah! There is a bunch of Shakespeare. Double Yeah! It's just a compelling read.

Quoted

"What some call health, if purchased by perpetual anxiety about diet, isn't much better than tedious disease."


- George Dennison Prentice

Fall 2010

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Somehow we have made it through the first nine weeks of school. Both Kaylee and Anna have made a smooth transition to middle school. Katie has stepped into the role of 'Mother Hen' to Ava. It's so strange to just have two kids at the elementary school.

It has certainly been a bittersweet fall. We have had extreme joy and pain with Emily and I pray she bores us to tears for the next few decades. Savannah and Kaylee both started band. Savannah is playing clarinet and Kaylee is playing trombone. As a former(and always) band nerd, I could not be more proud. Savannah had her first 'boyfriend' and got dumped within the first week. She is really following in her mama's footsteps :)

Now if I can just get through the holiday season with gaining 50 pounds, we will be in good shape.

Quoted

"There is no revenge so complete as forgiveness."

- Josh Billings (1818 - 1885)

Just Katie

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Quoted

"Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength."


- Eric Hoffer (1902 - 1983)

Sunday Girls

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Quoted

"If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land."

2 Chronicles 7:14 NIV

Book Review - Double Shot

I read this book because Sharon loved it. I had never even heard of this author before but apparently she is fairly prolific. This book is about a group of 4 couples who form a tight knit group and refer to themselves as 'The Castaways'. They all live somewhere in Nantucket. They go on fabulous vacations together. They end up having affairs within the group. Just so you know, this is why I don't have friends. Anyway, one of the couples ends up dead in a tragic accident. The rest of the book is about unravelling the supposed mystery of their deaths. It is a pretty disappointing ending to a fairly decent book.



I couldn't finish this book. It's about a mom, her sister and her two daughters. One daughter breaks off her engagement and then her former fiance dies in a tragic accident. This author is big on the tragic accident. All four gals head to Tuckernuck island to the family's summer house to heal...or something. I found that by page 65 I just did not care about any of these people. Not even the hunky island caretaker interested me. If you read it, lemme know how it ends but mostly I really don't care.

Quoted

"The abuse of greatness is when it disjoins remorse from power."

William Shakespeare

Book Review

I beg you.

Please do not read this book.

It is honestly one of the best written books I have ever read but I wish I had never picked it up. It is simply a horrifying story. Some reviewers at Amazon said they felt the book was hopeful. I was just hopeful I could finish it without making a Prozac sandwich.

Little Bee is a Nigerian refugee. You see...right there I should have known. How happy could a book about a Nigerian refugee be? Little Bee has an encounter with a British couple on the beach near her village. There are tragic consequences for pretty much everybody.

The author has created these haunting, real characters. He writes all this horror without any cliches or heavy handedness. It's just a fantastic book.

But, please, don't even think about reading it.

Quoted

"Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me."

- Matthew 5:11 (NIV)

Matt Chandler - Jesus Wants the Rose

Thank God he does.

Quoted

"If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?"

Coach John Wooden

Happy Birthday to Me!

37 years old.

If you knew how many stupid things I had done in my life, you would understand why getting older doesn't bother me in the least. Every year I get a little less dumb. So each birthday I embrace the chance to make progress. (This is subject to change in the next ten years depending on how much plastic surgery Kevin will pay for.)

I have so much to be thankful for. So much to look forward to. So many people to love.

My cup runneth over.

Quoted

"Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."

Romans 12:21

Every time you lie about me, I remember this verse.

Every time you are hateful to me, I remember this verse.

Every time you try to blame your bad choices on me, I remember this verse.


You may be the 'problem child' but I am a child of the Most High God.

So...
Each time you choose bitterness, I will choose forgiveness.

Each time you choose wrath, I will choose mercy.

Each time you choose lies, I will choose truth.

Each time you choose hate, I will choose love.

And it's not because I'm such a good person.

I do it because my father told me to.

Book Review - Quick Takes (Mostly nonfiction edition)

This book surprised me actually. I expected a long rambling discourse on heaven. I'm not suggesting that would have been bad. I was just intrigued that the author chose to spend the majority of his book discussing his accident and recovery. It was WAY less cheesey than I anticipated. And believe me I was prepared for a lot of cheese.



I tried hard not to read this book. Even when Oprah gave it the go ahead, I resisted. I have no idea why. Then I read the book. Now I know why. Good grief this chick is full of herself. I know it's a personal memoir but for THE LOVE OF GOD. There is a hysterical chapter involving pizza in Naples. The rest of it...bite me lady.




This book literally made me LOL. Poor Kevin had to endure two days of me reading this thing aloud. The chapter about colonics was Pulitzer worthy. (Also, note to self, never have a colonic. kthxbai.) Beyond the funny, I identified a bit too strongly with the author's food addiction. You either get it or you don't. If you don't, count yourself lucky and go eat half a candy bar.



Charlaine Harris...why can't I quit you?