A Warning

I have been writing a lot. Mostly in my head. I have created many posts that are in 'draft' form in my mind that I have been hesitant to put on (virtual) paper. Mostly because I am scared. I fear that my often strong and possibly offensive views could make people angry. I realize this is silly. This is MY blog. I started it primarily for my children. My goal was one thing. I wanted my kids to know me. While I hope I live a long, healthy life, I know that all of us are mortal. With that knowledge comes the desire to leave something of myself as an inheritance. I wanted this blog to be a diary, a scrapbook, a love letter and a devotional for Savannah, Kaylee and Ava. And I would love for it to be all those things to Dylan, Emily, Anna and Katie too.

I want them to see the real me.

Therein lies the problem. The real me is opinionated and loud. The real me is also tolerant of the opinions of others. You won't find me arguing often. I really do believe that everyone has a right to their own opinions (even if they drive me nuts) and to live their life however they see fit (assuming that doesn't infringe on the health and well being of my family.)But I feel that I have hidden part of myself in order to prove how agreeable I can be. I don't want to be a loud mouthed hypocrite. But it's disingenuous for me to continue to ignore aspects of my life that make up the core of the real me.

Most of the material that I have tried to subdue relates to my faith. Any future posts you may read regarding my Christian beliefs will be presented unapologetically. That's the real me. I am a Christian. I believe that the Bible is true. Yep. Every word of it. (And, no, I won't be debating you about a random verse you pulled out of Leviticus. There is an old covenant and a new covenant. Jesus died to set me free from the old covenant. It's not complicated but I'll explain it to you later if you like.) I strive to follow Jesus in every way possible. I am also a sinner who fails every day (often multiple times per day.) Much of my hesitation stems from my shame at the behavior of many so-called 'christians'. Understand that I do not consider it my job to judge the sincerity of anyone's faith. That being said, the Bible clearly tell me that I can discern a real Christian by the 'fruit' I see in their lives. So, if you call yourself a Christian but you march around with a sign that says "God hates Fags" then understand that I am judging you and that your 'fruit' proves to me that you have no real relationship with Christ. God hates sin but He is crazy in love with sinners. On that topic, I won't back down from an argument.

"For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God."

I do not think I am better than you regardless of what your belief system may be. But I want my kids to know that their mom was an imperfect woman who spent her life trying to serve a perfect God.


"For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ, for it is the power of God to salvation for everyone who believes"