Quoted

"We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, therefore, is not an act, but a habit."

Aristotle

Book Review - Shanghai Girls

It is my suggestion that all books come with a warning.

Let me just admit that I am a tender soul. I am easily horrified and once I have read, seen, or heard something horrible, it is very hard for me to forget. For example, I have never seen The Blair Witch Project but I am still tortured by my brother's frame by frame description of it delivered as I begged him to shut up while trying to block my eardrums with my fingers. I could give you many other examples but I am trying hard to forget them.

I chose this book based on the cover. Don't they look happy? Much to my chagrin, by page 60, I had already suffered through beheadings, gang rape, and internment camps. Don't you think somebody should have alluded to these things on the book jacket? I don't need this nonsense. If I want to experience torture, I'll start watching the news again. I read for entertainment. Exploding body parts are only entertaining to 19 year old boys which I ain't.

I should have known though. The other book I have read by the author, Snow Flower and the Secret Fan was all about foot binding. Which, honestly, is way more terrible than it sounds and it sounds pretty awful.


Is this a good book? Yep.

Is it interesting? You betcha.

Is it worth the trauma? Nope.

Quoted

"Do not look where you fell, but where you slipped."

African Proverb

Romans 8:18

"I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us."

Romans 8:18

Can you even begin to wrap your mind around this verse? We live in a world just overwhelmed with suffering. It is heartbreaking and never ending. This is no surprise to God.

"Not worth comparing"? Really? I have two friends who have watched their own babies die. Can you take a second to let the absolute horror of that take hold of you? Paul is telling us in this verse (and in pretty much everything he writes) that the tragedies we walk through can't even compare to what God has planned for us. Think about all the pain and suffering that occurs at St Jude's Hospital, a place just full of kids battling cancer. Think about the most horrible thing you ever heard about happening to someone. These things are enough to send the best of us spiralling into depression. Paul is not trying to belittle the horrors we face. He lived in the first century. I assure you Paul saw and experienced things that would dissolve us into a puddle of fear.

At this very moment, I know of two different families that are watching their children die of brain cancer. I don't even have a relationship with either of these families, I just know of them. And my heart still breaks for them. But what about the heart of God? He knows those kids. He knows their parents. They are beloved to him. And, yet, He is allowing them to suffer and to die. Why?

I don't know the answer. But I do know that God is good. I know how hard that is to cling to in a fallen, hurting world. I know the hope of heaven can be a cold comfort to someone suffering devastation. But I know that it's true. And I know that God is sovereign. Which means He could put an end to any suffering that exists. But He doesn't.

Psalm 103:14 says "For He knows what we are made of, remembering that we are dust." Beth Moore once said "He knows how scary it is to be us." I believe these things are true. God is not immune to our suffering. He knows our pain. He knows our fear. But, above all, He knows the end of all of our stories. And so, when He tells me, through Paul, that "our present sufferings are not worth comparing" I have to believe Him.

Quoted

"Try not to be a man of success, but a man of value."

- Albert Einstein

Book Review - Freedom

I think this book is important.

I think there are some deep literary truths in this book.

But I'll be damned if I know what they are.

This was an Oprah pick. I used to read all of Oprah's books and, honestly, the gal never let me down. Then she got into all that quasi-spiritual Eckhart Tolle mumbo jumbo and I just stopped paying much attention to her book club. When she announced this title, I put it on hold at the library and waited patiently while every other person in Mt Juliet read it.

It was actually worth waiting for. The main story is about the courtship, marriage and breakup of your average American couple. Walter and Patty Berglund meet in college, marry, start a family and settle in Minnesota. They have two kids. Everything is pretty boring. THE WAY GOD INTENDED IT. (Let me just interject a little bit here. Boring is not nearly as bad as everyone claims it is. I mean only that constant drama and creating tempests in teapots is not really necessary. Kevin and I can talk for two hours straight about carbohydrate metabolism. Jealous, ain't ya? My point is that you can have a lively, interesting life that may appear dull and boring to others.)

This family has your usual ups and downs until a crisis causes the mom to seek counseling. She is advised to write her life story as a therapy. Most of the novel is her story. It's fun to read. You kind of love and hate Patty Berglund. Which I'm guessing would be true of any of us should we choose to bare our real selves in such a way.

Then a lot of stuff happens. I don't know how else to say it. The book is just chock full of stuff happening. Some of it is moving and wonderful. Some of it is just...odd.

It strange to say but the thing I feel Johnathan Franzen really achieved with this novel is to lay bare the nature of matrimonial love. He allows the reader to witness the birth, adolescence, death, and rebirth of Walter and Patty's love.


I really did enjoy reading this even though I was often confused. It's altogether possible that I am just dumber than I thought. But even if I missed the point Franzen was trying to make, I liked the novel regardless.

Quoted

"May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house."

George Carlin

Book Review

Ok this book is about a nun that works in a hospital, gets pregnant by the head surgeon, gives birth to twins and dies within the first twenty pages. I know, right! Look, this guy had me at "pregnant nun" but it just kept getting better and better. The majority of the novel is set in an Ethiopian hospital. The nun's kids are raised by the remaining two surgeons at the hospital. (Thomas Stone the surgeon/baby daddy runs off after their birth. Don't worry. He shows back up later.)

The amazing thing about this book is the way the author constructs a completely foreign world that feels familiar. The family consists of the two docs, who go on to marry, the twin boys, two servants and one of their daughters. Not what you would call an American style nuclear family. But somehow, except for the names, it feels like this bunch could be living next door to me.

It's not an easy read. It's just under 700 pages. But it doesn't feel like work. And I guarantee it will be a completely fresh story for you...unless there is a whole pregnant nun genre that I am unaware of.

Parenting - Part 2

I almost feel like this lady is stalking me. Amy Chua must have majored in marketing. You can't write a book like this and not expect the American public to go insane. But she insists that she is completely shocked at the response. I ain't buying this defense. If I wanted to start some nonsense, I could go to Facebook right now and post something about working moms versus stay at home moms or breastfeeding versus bottlefeeding and have every friend I have in a total uproar by the end of the day. (I would never do such a stupid thing, I'm just creating an example.) People are very sensitive about their choices as parents. So am I. So that's why I find it impossible to believe that Ms Chua wasn't well aware of the uproar she would create. When I first saw her on the Today show, I didn't pay much attention. I really do have strong opinions about pretty much everything but I don't have the mental energy to spend on every crackpot who writes about their parenting methods. And also, I keep reminding myself that it's not really my business.

But she kept making it my business. Everywhere I looked, there she was. They even did a review in The Economist. THE ECONOMIST PEOPLE!!! Only nerds like my husband read The Economist (which is how I happened to stumble upon the review, btw.) Let me admit I have not read this book. Normally I would feel that fact precludes me from talking about it. Maybe there's a ton of info in it that the media has ignored? Maybe she's not actually nuts? Maybe she has a good reason for thinking that forcing a kid to rehearse 3 hours a day is ok. (Who actually has three free hours available. That stuns me.) Maybe there's a good reason you would throw a birthday card your kid made you back in their face? Wait...nevermind on that one. there actually can't be any good reason a parent would do that. (Unless it said "Happy Birthday Mom. I hate your guts.") But my favorite rabbi, Schmuley Boteach, weighed in with his opinion, and as usual I agreed with him. Here's some of his response. Do yourself a favor and read the whole thing here.

Sure, we can all agree with Chua that TV and video games are a waste of time and I endorse her call for far greater discipline in parenting. But where does selflessness figure in the values by which she raises her children? Should every child really be raised believing that the greatest gift they can give the world is to inflict their vast achievement on it?

Indeed her book has generated such a wide readership precisely because American parents seem so much more interested these days in raising successful rather than good children, kids who excel at making money rather than making friends, at obtaining status rather than obtaining wisdom, at winning championships rather than championing a cause larger than themselves.

Here's the thing. I want my kids to be successful, sure. But more than anything I want them to be soulful and moral. Yes, I would like to see them prosper, afford nice things, and earn the admiration of their peers. But damn it, if money and status become more important to them than being ethical, altruistic, and giving then I have utterly failed as a parent.

Yes. Yes. 1000 times yes. Let me give you an example of how this looks in a real family. Katie is no big fan of car rides. None of the kids really are. She was helping Ava with a school project when we had to interrupt to make the trip to Lebanon to pick up the minivan from the repair shop. She had the option of making the 40 minute round trip with us or going back to her mom's house. She chose to take the trip so she could help Ava finish. That was a completely unselfish thing for her to do. I know she would have much rather skipped the trip and headed back to her mom early. I will take that kind of behavior over a good report card any day of the week. (Katie makes straight A's but that wasn't my point.)

In Ms Chua's defense, her strategy worked. Her book is a bestseller. She has completely saturated the media market. And a chubby housewife wrote a blog post about it.

Mission Accomplished!

Quoted

"I'm a foot-washing, Psalm-singing, total immersion Democrat"

- Liz Carpenter

Me too!

And herein lies the post I hate to write. But I gotta.

Two weeks ago at the National Prayer Breakfast, President Obama confirmed his faith in Christ. Don't start arguing with me yet. Just gimme a second here. When questioned about it later, Obama responded that he had given his life to Jesus Christ. I point that out because I feel his language is important. Plenty of people claim to be Christians. Very few people, in my experience, use the kind of definitive language that Obama did. I was no fan of George W. Bush. But when he professed his faith in Christ, I never once said "No way. Not buying it." You may have a litany of things that you feel prove Obama is not a Christian. But I believe I could biblically come up with just as many reasons to disprove Bush's faith. But I'm not sure what the point of that would be.

Maybe you just hate Obama's guts. I'm ok with that. He ain't my personal favorite either. But I saw a huge focus group from Iowa state that they simply do not believe that he is a Christian at all. They believe he is a Muslim. I cannot wrap my head around this. If Obama is planning to enact Sharia law in America and proclaim himself our Kenyan Islamic Overlord, when does he plan to get that going? I mean he has been president for 2 years. It seems like that's the kinda thing you should get moving on pretty quickly, right? I am not being completely facetious here. I'm just trying to say that if Obama's plan is to ruin all that we cherish as a Christian nation, you would have to admit that he sucks at it. Obama and his pissant democratic cohorts in Congress can't even repeal tax cuts for millionaires. I don't think you have to worry about them becoming the Taliban 2.0.

Confession - Country Music Edition

I don't love county music. I like a lot of it. And I really do enjoy what I consider to be 'real' country music. And, yes, I know the argument about what constitutes real country music is the ultimate Nashville cliche. But I miss Tammy Wynette and Conway Twitty. Heck, I even miss Barbara Mandrell and she's still alive, as far as I know.

But one person I really don't enjoy is Kenny Chesney. It's not his voice, it's his goofy persona. Even the image in this video grates on me. The cowboy hat covering his eyes. And the album title...Hemingway's Whiskey. It actually makes me want to punch something. It's all just so contrived.

That being said. I frickin love this song. LOVE IT. I literally paid money to own a Kenny Chesney song. My street cred (which I never had in the first place) is ruined. And then, much to my chagrin, I found this song while I was searching for the video and I love it too. What's happening to me? Is it just a matter of time before I am attending Fan Fair* to stand in line and get my satin tour jacket signed?

* I know it's not called Fan Fair anymore but I choose to ignore whatever new fancypants name they call it now. It's always gonna be Fan Fair. Accept it and move on.

Quoted

"A man who views the world the same at fifty as he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life."

Muhammad Ali

I am often ashamed when I look back on many of the opinions I held as a younger person. But I think it would be more shameful if I looked back to realize that my ideas were virtually identical to those held by my 20 something self. Mostly because my 20 something self was really quite stupid.

Scenes from Kline Manor

The set up:

Savannah and Kaylee are in a period of complete obsession with Michael Jackson. They have the luxury of only knowing him as a talented singer and dancer. I, on the other hand, can't think of Michael without focusing on the crazy. So I'm a little jealous.

Santa brought this Michael Jackson game for the Wii. The kids love it. Kevin patiently tolerates it. And me? Well, honestly if I hear 'Dirty Diana' one more time, I may take a hostage. In an effort to expand her repertoire, Savannah chose to play 'The Girl Is Mine' on this particular day.

Katie: "Who is Paul McCartney?"

Savannah: " I don't know. I think he might be Jesse McCartney's dad."

8 years of the finest public school education my tax dollars could buy and my kid has no idea who Paul McCartney is. I weep for our nation's future.

Quoted - The B-I-B-L-E Edition

But now, this is what the LORD says-- he who created you, O Jacob, he who formed you, O Israel: "Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine.

Isaiah 43:1

I think I could make a pretty good argument that the whole of the Bible, both Old and New Testament, is summed up in this verse.

He chose me.

He redeemed me.

He called me.

He knows my name.

I belong to Him.

Fear not.

The Challenge - I suck edition

"Nobody knows how bad they are until they have tried very hard to be good."
C.S. Lewis

The Good: For one whole month...31 long days, I did not even step foot into Cindy Lou's Used Bookstore. I wanted to. I drive by there at least once a day. And I have a coupon. People, can you begin to understand how hard it is for me to resist used books plus a coupon? It would have been easier for me to turn down a Krispy Creme Doughnut sandwich. (In case you don't know. That's a doughnut between two other doughnuts...sprinkles and chocolate optional.)

The Bad: I bought new bedding for the girls. Here's my excuse. I was gonna buy it anyway. I have been moving kid's rooms around so new bedding has been on my agenda for quite a while. I could have waited until February to buy them but that seemed more like cheating. I also bought Katie a new dresser for her room but she needed it...and I put it together myself...and it was a great deal. Frankly I don't need your judgement.

The Ugly: I guess the hardest part of this challenge was realizing how much I shop. It's odd. I hardly ever go shopping. Meaning I don't go out with a plan to visit several stores and buy stuff. But obviously, I buy stuff online and here and there throughout my week. Somehow I convinced myself that wasn't 'shopping'. Isn't it weird how we delude ourselves? And when I say 'we', I mean 'me'. In the end, I'm glad I tried this. I think it definitely gave me some insight into a troubling behavior of mine. I don't think I need a 12 step program just yet but if one of you guys start to see me at Ross more than twice a month, perhaps an intervention might be in order?

Quoted

"One should always be a little improbable."

Oscar Wilde