Book Review - Kevin Leman Edition

I wasn't actually interested in having a new husband or new kids by Friday. I am always interested in having a new me by any day though. I read all three of these books in the same week. (They are short and easy to get through.) The author, Dr. Kevin Leman is a pychologist and a Christian. Here's all you need to know about the the first two books. If you want a new husband by Friday, don't demean him. Treat him like an adult and have lots of sex with him. To this advice I respnd with a hearty 'Duh'.



If you want to have a new kid by Friday, Dr Leman suggests that you tell your kids to do something once and then walk away. If they do it, great. If they don't, you allow them to experience the natural consequences. I'm sure he is right about this but I am personally fighting an uphill battle on this one. Raising two families of kids with different expectations of responsibility, politeness and behavior in general is not easy. And, pretty much, I suck at it.



Having a new you by Friday is a little more complicated. Dr Leman first identifies your personality type. Unfortunately, I don't fit neatly into any of his categories. I did identify a lot of other people's personality types which was actually pretty helpful. I spend too much of my time wondering why people do the stupid nonsense that they do. This information gave me much insight into answering those questions. The next step is identifying your birth order. This was easy. I am a textbook firstborn. Control freak, perfectionist...your basic nightmare. The interesting thing about this part was discovering how few of our combined children fit the category of their birth order. The last part of the process was thinking about specific childhood memories. This was quite illuminating for me. It's fodder for another post though...after I think about it for 15or so years. The thing I really like about Leman's approach is that he doesn't allow you to use personality or birth order or childhood experiences as a crutch. He wants you to identify them in order to see why you react to situations in the way that you do but also realize that you have the ability to change. A firstborn can lighten up. A lastborn can start acting responsibly.

I'm sure there are people who are completely happy with themselves. They like the way they look, act and think. If someone doesn't like them, they never internalize it. They blame the other person and move on.

I am not one of these people.

But I might be one by Friday...or possibly Saturday.