Ugh

I'm in a book slump.

It's killing me.

I finally forced myself to go back to the library.  I had made it through the holidays with some used books I bought and a few freebies on the Kindle but they couldn't last forever.  I hadn't been in six weeks.  The exact amount of time that Anna's book was overdue.  After 45 days of saying "Found it yet?" and getting "nope, I forgot to look" for an answer, I handed the librarian 25 bucks and begged forgiveness. 

With my record sponged clean, I began to browse with a sense of excitement.  15 minutes later, I trudged to my car empty handed.  Not one thing there interested me. 

Undeterred, I went back three days later determined to take home an armload of literary masterpieces.  I picked up 7 (!) books and headed home.

I started with this one.



Here's what happened on page 3.

"Emily Sanders? he says with a voice that sounds like warm t-shirt sheets, fresh from the dryer."

Have you EVER, in your entire life, read a more contrived sentence?  I'm convinced that publishers don't even use editors anymore.  How could they and still let such a sentence be printed in a book people actually pay for (unless they're cheap and get it from the library, like me.)?

Here's the author pic from the back cover.

I searched everywhere for the full size picture to post.  You can't get the full effect without seeing the way she is contorted to hold both hands on one crossed leg.  This has nothing to do with her as an author, it just amuses me.

While searching for the picture, I did discover that this book had been the basis for a really bad sitcom starring Heather Graham and that the author is married to the defensive coach for the Tennessee Titans. 

So I am on to book number 2.  If it doesn't work out, I might take up knitting or Tae-bo...again.