D'oh

Have you ever done something really, really stupid?  You know...like so stupid that as soon as you realize what you have done, you pray desperately for the ability to travel back in time.

Yeah well that was me after deciding to drive through our yard one dark night.  Why oh why would anyone do such a thing?!?!

The morning light only made the situation worse.  After trying to reinjure his hernia, my husband only managed to get his own truck stuck.  So now we had two vehicles mired in our backyard.  Our pride was not wounded.  It was nonexistent.

Luckily we have a really nice neighbor who heard of my stupidity and took pity on us.  In less than 30 minutes, he had rectified our dilemna.  Thank God for Republicans with four-wheel drives.

Bible Tuesday - Movie Edition!

I finally watched The Lord of the Rings movies. Not just the movies, the extra long, super nerdy, extended editions. I didn't not see them earlier on purpose. I just got real busy for about ten years.
But good grief, it was worth the wait. I love this thing more than doughnuts.

But the one thing that I keep coming back to is this idea of "The Return of the King". It's a pretty universal theme in literature (and Disney movies). A king in exile. A battle. His rightful ascension to the throne. It speaks to our human understanding that something is wrong with the world we live in. That we need to be rescued. It's that need that makes us weep when Aragorn finally gets that crown on his head. And it's that need that consumes me each time I read this:

Then I saw Heaven open wide—and oh! a white horse and its Rider. The Rider, named Faithful and True, judges and makes war in pure righteousness. His eyes are a blaze of fire, on his head many crowns. He has a Name inscribed that's known only to himself. He is dressed in a robe soaked with blood, and he is addressed as "Word of God." The armies of Heaven, mounted on white horses and dressed in dazzling white linen, follow him. A sharp sword comes out of his mouth so he can subdue the nations, then rule them with a rod of iron. He treads the winepress of the raging wrath of God, the Sovereign-Strong. On his robe and thigh is written, King of kings, Lord of lords.
Revelation 19:11-16 (The Message)

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. ² And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. ³ And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Behold, the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be his people, and God himself will be with them as their God. ⁴ He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.”
⁵ And he who was seated on the throne said, “Behold, I am making all things new.” Also he said, “Write this down, for these words are trustworthy and true.” ⁶ And he said to me, “It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment. ⁷ The one who conquers will have this heritage, and I will be his God and he will be my son.
Revelation 21:1-7  (English Standard Version)

Lots of people are scared of the book of Revelation.  But I love it.  Sure, there's a lot of blood.  It's not pretty.  Some bad stuff goes down.  It also can be a little weird.  There are things there that I can't begin to understand.

But it's all worth it. 

Because in the end, the King returns. 

Come quickly, Lord Jesus.  Come quickly.

Next year's Christmas Card

Quoted - Piper Edition

The words of Jesus are the window through which we see the Light of Jesus. And through which we climb by faith.

-  John Piper

Bible Thursday

There have been many babies to become a king

But only one King became a baby

The idea of theophany captivates me at this time of year.  If God could take on flesh as the person of Jesus Christ, why did He choose to do so as a newborn baby?  Wouldn't it have been a whole lot easier to step into the streets of Nazareth as a full grown man? 

Hebrews 2 may hold the answer.

For this reason he had to be made like them, fully human in every way, in order that he might become a merciful and faithful high priest in service to God, and that he might make atonement for the sins of the people.  Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted.

Jesus had to become an embryo.
He had to become a fetus.
He had to become a newborn baby.
A two year old.
A teenager.
An adult.

Jesus could not be fully human until he experienced the same development that each of us must go through.  But God chose to do that.  He didn't have to.  And that fact humbles and mystifies me.
What kind of love would propel God to step out of Heaven into the helpless body of a baby?  And then surrender himself to the limitations of that human body up to death on a cross? 

It's this knowledge that makes me break out into the ugly cry every time I see a nativity scene.  Here's hoping you do the same :)

Bible Tuesday - Mo' Samson

 ²There was a certain man of Zorah, of the tribe of the Danites, whose name was Manoah. And his wife was barren and had no children. ³ And the angel of the LORD appeared to the woman and said to her, "Behold, you are barren and have not borne children, but you shall conceive and bear a son.


To be fair, this post has very little to do with Samson and a whole lot to do with Jesus. 

I became a Christian when I was 28 years old.  And even though I was a voracious reader, my exposure to the Bible was limited to say the least.  So as I began my first real reading of the Bible,  I was really only concerned with Jesus.  Being a new Christian is an experience akin to first love.  I was just consumed with Jesus.  I could not get enough.  (If you are lucky, that feeling lasts for the rest of your life.)  I say all this to explain to you that I read the Old Testament for the first time, I saw Jesus or prophecies about Jesus everywhere.  I didn't know, at the time, that these appearances had a fancy pants name.  They're called theophanies or christophanies.

Baker's Evangelical Dictionary defines it this way :  Manifestation of God that is tangible to the human senses. In its most restrictive sense, it is a visible appearance of God in the Old Testament period often, but not always, in human form.

So in Judges 13, 'THE' Angel of the Lord appears to Samson's mama.  Angels show up quite a bit in the Bible.  But sometimes 'AN' angel appears and sometimes 'THE' angel appears.   When a 'THE' angel moment occurs, I always assume it's Jesus.  I'm sure someone with a seminary degree could dispute this but I don't care.

Samson's dad, Manoah is not convinced about the angel situation.

 ⁸Then Manoah prayed to the LORD and said, "O Lord, please let the man of God whom you sent come again to us and teach us what we are to do with the child who will be born."

Guess what happens.

⁹And God listened to the voice of Manoah, and the angel of God came again to the woman as she sat in the field.

That verse makes me so happy. But let's keep going.

But Manoah her husband was not with her. ¹⁰So the woman ran quickly and told her husband, "Behold, the man who came to me the other day has appeared to me."  ¹¹And Manoah arose and went after his wife and came to the man and said to him, "Are you the man who spoke to this woman?"

OK...here's where it gets awesome. 

"And he said, "I am."

The Angel said "I am".  For real.  Remind you of anything?

^"14God said to Moses, "I AM WHO I AM." And he said, "Say this to the people of Israel, 'I AM has sent me to you.'"

Or how about this?

^"58Jesus said to them, "Truly, truly, I say to you, before Abraham was, I am."

I'm not saying these two verse prove that Jesus appeared in human form during Old Testament days but it makes me happy to believe so I'm gonna go with it.

More on theophany tomorrow.  Ain't you excited?

Quoted

If you are in a wilderness being tempted by the devil, you might be right where God wants you (Matthew 4:1).

-  Ray Ortlund

An Oral Presentation

Let's just say that Katie is no fan of the public speaking.

So this is as close as we are gonna get to seeing her present what I am sure was a fascinating report on the life of Taylor Swift.

Quoted - Blue Like Jazz Edition

"I believed if word got out about grace, the whole church was going to turn into a brothel."


- Donald Miller

I think a bunch of my beloved Baptist brethren feel this way too.  And it's too bad because they need grace as much as the rest of us.

Book Review - John Grisham - Double Shot

The Confession is John Grisham at his best.  And his best is pretty dang good.

A scary looking parolee walks into a small church one day asking to speak to the minister.  He confesses to the murdering a teenage girl 9 years ago.  The man convicted for that crime is due to be executed within the week.

Grisham's finest book, in my opinion, is The Innocent Man, a work of nonfiction.  Even if you are not a bleeding heart liberal (and I'm guessing you ain't) this book will make you question some long held societal beliefs.  It's clear that Grisham took a lot of what he learned writing that book and used it as a springboard for the fictional story in The Confession.  As the story unfolds, you witness how tragic that murder really was.  You get to see just how many people are affected by one violent act.  It's heartbreaking but, I think, necessary.

Grisham didn't take the easy road with this novel.  He made decisions that hit the reader like a gut punch.  But, in the end, I think he created a story that is believable even if you wish it wasn't.

The Litigators.  Oy...

This is John Grisham at his worst.  It almost seems like he didn't write it at all.

The premise is fine.  Two ambulance chasing older lawyers with a firm that is always just barely solvent.  Add to that a hotshot young corporate attorney who has a very early midlife crisis and winds up at their door.

After the very serious drama in The Confession, I can totally understand why Grisham would want to write a lighter novel.  And there is nothing wrong with that except that, in this case, it is done so sloppy.  For example, David, the young attorney, is lamenting the fact that his wife wants to have a baby.  He works so many hours at his corporate job that he is never home long enough to get his wife pregnant.  I'm not sure how realistic this scenario is but I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt.  Then two weeks after he moves to the small firm, his wife is pregnant and shopping for baby clothes.  Do what?  I'm not saying this couldn't happen, I'm just saying that the timeline is a lil whack and any good editor should have told the author so.  Doesn't it seem like a literary superstar like John Grisham would have a stellar editor?

The book does have a few interesting storylines and I wouldn't consider it a complete waste of time.  But if you love John Grisham, I think you too will be left thinking that this could have been a much better book.

The Lazy Elves

We really would like to destroy this Christmas tree.

But we are much too tired

to do it right now.

Quoted

Prayer is not overcoming God's reluctance, but laying hold of His willingness.

- Martin Luther

Bible Tuesday

Some time later, he fell in love with a woman in the Valley of Sorek whose name was Delilah. ⁵ The rulers of the Philistines went to her and said, “See if you can lure him into showing you the secret of his great strength and how we can overpower him so we may tie him up and subdue him. Each one of us will give you eleven hundred shekels^[a] of silver.”
⁶ So Delilah said to Samson, “Tell me the secret of your great strength and how you can be tied up and subdued.”
⁷ Samson answered her, “If anyone ties me with seven fresh bowstrings that have not been dried, I’ll become as weak as any other man.”
⁸ Then the rulers of the Philistines brought her seven fresh bowstrings that had not been dried, and she tied him with them. ⁹ With men hidden in the room, she called to him, “Samson, the Philistines are upon you!” But he snapped the bowstrings as easily as a piece of string snaps when it comes close to a flame. So the secret of his strength was not discovered.
¹⁰ Then Delilah said to Samson, “You have made a fool of me; you lied to me. Come now, tell me how you can be tied.”
¹¹ He said, “If anyone ties me securely with new ropes that have never been used, I’ll become as weak as any other man.”
¹² So Delilah took new ropes and tied him with them. Then, with men hidden in the room, she called to him, “Samson, the Philistines are upon you!” But he snapped the ropes off his arms as if they were threads.
¹³ Delilah then said to Samson, “All this time you have been making a fool of me and lying to me. Tell me how you can be tied.”
He replied, “If you weave the seven braids of my head into the fabric on the loom and tighten it with the pin, I’ll become as weak as any other man.” So while he was sleeping, Delilah took the seven braids of his head, wove them into the fabric ¹⁴ and^[b] tightened it with the pin.
Again she called to him, “Samson, the Philistines are upon you!” He awoke from his sleep and pulled up the pin and the loom, with the fabric.
¹⁵ Then she said to him, “How can you say, ‘I love you,’ when you won’t confide in me? This is the third time you have made a fool of me and haven’t told me the secret of your great strength.” ¹⁶ With such nagging she prodded him day after day until he was sick to death of it.
¹⁷ So he told her everything. “No razor has ever been used on my head,” he said, “because I have been a Nazirite dedicated to God from my mother’s womb. If my head were shaved, my strength would leave me, and I would become as weak as any other man.”
¹⁸ When Delilah saw that he had told her everything, she sent word to the rulers of the Philistines, “Come back once more; he has told me everything.” So the rulers of the Philistines returned with the silver in their hands. ¹⁹ After putting him to sleep on her lap, she called for someone to shave off the seven braids of his hair, and so began to subdue him.^[c] And his strength left him.

Judges 16


Samson.

I have much too much to say about this joker.  His character makes my brain run in circles.

Like the prophet Samuel or John the Baptist, Samson has a great conception and birth story. (I have a post about that coming some time later. I know you can't wait.)  But that's where the similarities end. Between stories about him being stupid, we get one verse that says 'he judged Israel in the days of the Philistines for 20 years.'  That type of verse in the book of Judges generally means that things went pretty well.  It had to be nothing but the power of God that allowed Samson to keep it together for two decades.  On his own, it barely seems like the dude could get his own shoes on.

And maybe that's the point.

Actually, I am pretty sure that is the point.  Over and over throughout the Bible, God shows just what He can accomplish through twerps like Samson.  And hopefully through twerps like me and you. 

In his most famous story, Samson has been duped by Delilah.  I hate to use that word.  'Duped' kinda implies that she had to work at it.  Mostly she was just persistent.  Don't you read this story and wonder what kind of moron couldn't figure that deal out?  But even after that pile of stupid, God is at work.  And that leads to one of my favorite verses of scripture.  (Do you get tired of me saying that?  I know.  It is wearisome, ain't it?)

 But the hair on his head began to grow again after it had been shaved.   -  Judges 16:22

Samson's hair was just a symbol of God's power inexplicably working through him.  He lost it for a while but then it grew back.  I have made a lot of Samson level mistakes.  You know the kind.  The stuff you look back on and wonder how anyone could do anything that stupid.  I mean embarassing stupid.  I've actually done that several times.  I'm not proud to admit it.  But I am proud to serve a God of second, third and sixty fourth chances.  And I am thankful He can and does redeem the stupid over and over again.

Someone on the internet is wrong...

I spend most of my life being outraged by one thing or another.  It's an emotion I am well acquainted with.   That being said, I am mystified by the level of outrage that the internet America seems to have against Michelle Duggar. 

Asking me if I am a fan of the Duggars is like asking me how I feel about the family living down the street from me.  I'm sure they are fine people.  I wish them no ill will.  But I don't spend a ton of time thinking about them.  I have seen the Duggar's tv show a handful of times. I admit that I don't understand the desire to have that many kids much less homeschool the lil punks.  But, more than that, I do not understand how or why you could hate this family.

An onslaught of just pure disgust was unleashed when the Duggars announced they were pregnant with their 20th child.  Look the Duggars have a tv show that you can choose not to watch.  If they show up on the Today show, just change the channel like I do every time I see a Kardashian.  It's easy and you will feel a whole lot better. 

I guess I wouldn't mind so much if people just voiced their opinion.  But must you be so hateful?  Now that this family has suffered through a lost pregnancy, is it really necessary for you to act like this is some kind of payback?  When you state that this baby's death 'must have been God's will LOL', do you realize how pathetic you are?  The loss of that child absolutely was God's will and I feel sure the Duggars would agree. 

But I wonder if you would be willing to examine your own heart.  Would you ask yourself what it is about this family that causes you to act like a complete moron.  So much so that you would take time out of your life to comment on every internet article about this family with insults, taunts and just unadulterated obscenity.

God loves all you people but some of you are gettin on my last nerve.

Quoted

"At Christmas, God moved into a very bad neighborhood and began rehabilitating it."

Tim Keller

Bible Tuesday

Numbers 11

The People Complain

⁴Now the rabble that was among them had a strong craving. And the people of Israel also wept again and said, "Oh that we had meat to eat! ⁵ We remember the fish we ate in Egypt that cost nothing, the cucumbers, the melons, the leeks, the onions, and the garlic. ⁶But now our strength is dried up, and there is nothing at all but this manna to look at."
⁷Now the manna was like coriander seed, and its appearance like that of bdellium. ⁸ The people went about and gathered it and ground it in handmills or beat it in mortars and boiled it in pots and made cakes of it. And the taste of it was like the taste of cakes baked with oil. ⁹ When the dew fell upon the camp in the night, the manna fell with it.
¹⁰Moses heard the people weeping throughout their clans, everyone at the door of his tent. And the anger of the LORD blazed hotly, and Moses was displeased. ¹¹ Moses said to the LORD, "Why have you dealt ill with your servant? And why have I not found favor in your sight, that you lay the burden of all this people on me? ¹²Did I conceive all this people? Did I give them birth, that you should say to me, 'Carry them in your bosom, as a nurse carries a nursing child,' to the land that you swore to give their fathers? ¹³ Where am I to get meat to give to all this people? For they weep before me and say, 'Give us meat, that we may eat.' ¹⁴ I am not able to carry all this people alone; the burden is too heavy for me. ¹⁵If you will treat me like this, kill me at once, if I find favor in your sight, that I may not see my wretchedness."



Moses is kinda having a bad day.


The Israelites are whining for meat.


And Moses is whining to God.


Moses says “I am not able to carry all this people alone, the burden is too heavy for me.” He also asks  "Where am I to get meat to give to all this people?"   But here’s the thing...God never asked Moses to carry the burden of the Israelites alone and He definitely did not ask Moses to provide meat for them.  God was providing manna for the Israelites to eat daily. It was a kind of weird food but it provided all the sustenance that they needed.  The Israelites didn’t need meat, they just wanted it.


Moses was overwhelmed by their wants when God had provided for all their needs.  Sounds pretty familiar, doesn't it?  Moses is upset because he can't make the Israelites happy.  And he is having a hard time understanding why God is standing by just watching him fail so miserably at this task. 


How often do we fall into this trap ourselves?  Maybe it's a mom thing.  But for all my 'tough love' talk, I really do want my family to be happy.  And when they 'whine for meat', I feel like a miserable failure.  But God did not call any of us to provide complete satisfaction and happiness to anyone.  And attempting to do so is gonna lead to some pretty bad days.

Tebowing

I hesitate to write this post.  See I don't have a great track record when it comes to defending supposedly 'good' Christian men.  But if loving Tim Tebow is wrong, I don't wanna be right. 


Full disclosure here.  I know next to nothing about football.  And, for a long time, all I knew about Tim Tebow was that a lot of people hated his guts.  I didn't think much about it.  I don't understand sports people.  I don't even bother to try.

But lately, the Tebow hate has infected every area of media I see.  So I have been trying to write a post about it.  Then this guy wrote what I have been trying to say...only way better.

I will only add this.  If Tebow gets caught next week doing meth with a male prostitute, that won't prove his critics right.  It will only prove that I should never, ever blog about anyone again.

Book Review - The Beekeeper's Apprentice

Lord have mercy...I loved this book.

This novel is the first in a series ( a series - yeah!!!) It is a new take on Sherlock Holmes. In this series, Holmes is in his early 50's. He has 'retired' and is living outside London in a small country village. Holmes is literally stumbled upon by his 15 year old neighbor Mary Russell. Mary has lost her parents and brother in a car accident and is living with her aunt until she comes into her inheritance at age 21. In Mary, Holmes finds a comparable mind to his own. He takes her on as his apprentice.

Here's the thing. I have never read the original Sherlock Holmes. Everything I know about the famous detective, I learned from Robert Downey Jr. So I enjoyed this book without any preconceptions about how the characters should act. This book is chock full of cases to be solved. And I thoroughly enjoyed each and every one of them.

Quoted

When I am in the cellar of affliction, I look for the Lord's choicest wines.

- Samuel Rutherford