Email musings

I have no job. Due to that, you would think my email would be minimal. You would be wrong. More often than not, the contents of my inbox are just weird.

For example.

Today I received an email from Crossings Book Club. I am a member and they wanted me to "Reply to My Featured Selections". No big deal. Happens every month. Usually they offer great books by popular Christian authors. This month, the main book was a novel called The Amish Nanny. This brings the following questions to my mind.

1. Why would the Amish even need a nanny? Are Amish women suddenly hitting the work force in droves?

2. Haven't we really exhausted this genre in Christian fiction? I mean I get it. The Amish are a simple people. It's easy to use them as the center of Christian romance stories because you don't have to worry about sex scenes. Although, and I don't mean to be crude here, I bet you could write a novel about an Amish girl embroiled in a hot,sexy love affair and it would sell like hotcakes.

3. What's next? The Amish Housekeeper? The Amish Day Care Center? In the name of all that is Good people, please stop writing these books. If nothing else, try writing about Mennonites. At least it will change things up a bit.


The next email to catch my attention was from Curves. How does Curves even know me? It's like the one diet program I am proud to say I have not attempted. Does the internet know I am a chubby housewife? Has it somehow detected that I am a very likely candidate to sacrifice Kevin's hard earned money on the altar of their empty promises? Let me guess. Are they gonna tell me to eat less and exercise more? It's a revolutionary concept but...no thanks.